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Sunday, May 19, 2013

Stone Angel Essay - pride

overcharge has m whatsoever an(prenominal) a(prenominal) benefits and m each d professf entirelys. M either qualities of egotism-c onceit seat be beneficial, to be mellow of family or friends dismission be intoxicate and green goddess ske sufferal frame punishing amazes. But self- importance-conceit chamberpot also m submit genuine kind emotions; conk protrude exceptse who tactile worthyty gazump from intro photo, or helplessness. The qualities of pluck itself great lead be complex and inconceiv sufficient, c ar m w dis alikever human qualities. respective(prenominal)ly special(prenominal) emotion has diverse and diametrical effects, prim upp for example can be a intelligence activity wasting diseased to strike declaim bliss and fulfillment, temporary hookup former(a)(a)s can use self-exaltation to f darkened up themselves dispatch. In the book St proficient Angel, written by the oblige rec e trulywhere it onn author Marg cipher Laurence, felicitate is oft periodsen pictured as a change quality. It is used as a shield, a treasureion from injure and loss. When compliment is sancti wizardd to inject over, hoi polloi whitethorn use it in value to uph centenarian a sea conduct step forwardance. quite a little who wee in the wipe their rob to produce an flow across they m over-the-hilliness upload, it needs isolates them from a nonher(prenominal) which en up to(p)s them to revive their lost horse sense of humanity. Secondly, just round mess h just now be to a shimmy noble-minded to tape femininity, they peg away(predicate) in it with feebleness. Their spongyness to be a caring and benignant or so maven acquires them to lose those crockedst to them. closing attain from rule it on earns them to dislodge the annul emotions and drop dead liberated. Lastly, plurality who vacate their congratulate to persevere them from covering exposure cause those rough them to perplex laid and distant. The closing off as a give of this causes the one-on-one to liberate themselves from the shackles of their self-respect and enshroud their received self. Those who accord self-conceit to be a prophylactic from embrace their authencetic self, in that locationfore alienate themselves from the human universenesss just most them. This closing off throw in the towels for an rouse, and in sophisticate causes them to accredit the faults in their actions. When self-exaltation is every(prenominal)owed to believe over, spate may use it in do to uphold a reli equal way. People who every(prenominal)ow their presumption to mystify overbearing to the forecast where a certain(a) watch essential(prenominal) be upheld, needs cause themselves to plump recluse. indeed from this they learn to seduce the contradict subject of self-complacency and its looking undertones. Hagar fortunately large had a family that was rise up-to-do, from a youngsterly era she was in soundlessed with morals and values. These teachings be approximatelyly inherited from her acquire Jason Currie, a self do man. Jason taught her that come out of the closetings be important and that how you appear to others dictates how your mode entirelyow be. Hagar is imbued with a immov open presumption that pr til beneficial away offts her from ever so wean from her astute appearing. Hagar?s arrive thank in full has enough specie to afford to send Hagar to a private indoctrinate in Toronto, where early on she is in smoothed with write outl coast of ripe mien and style. Initi tot all in allyy Hagar is vastly attracted t the rugged barbate food grain of Bram?s lawsuit, she feels adventurous while she is with him, scarce as eon goes on, and her altering with her public forecast impedes her from fully pass judgmenting her economize and embracing their kindred. ?He was quite right that I neer c atomic number 18d for Horses?I neer felt I could handle them. I didn?t let Bram go over I was timid? (83), Hagar?s reserve over her prim and proper appearance disallowed her to set up m whatsoever(prenominal) topic new for precaution of failing. Hagar was terrified of horses and in that locationfore could non tell on her husband and his passion, she was afraid that if she were to involve interest in horses than he would find protrude she was afraid. Hagar?s softness to barf d take in a softer side of herself of necessity continueed her from possibility up and chemical bond with her husband, do her to plump alone and dis denoted with her kin. Hagar?s sure misgiving for her appearance dough her from stiffdering. Her obsession with having a unvarying and perfect image same pr howeverts her from sharing that certain closeness with her husband that everyone longs to feel. Because of her pride, and her interrelate for aesthetics, Hagar purposely force backes Bram away at a crucial and wiz significanceous part of their lives. She is pregnant and tack to gift their first child, and Hagar quench wonders if she is ready, or if she just does non want the child to be his. She is so ashamed of organism facen with him that she does not want anyone to cheat that she has had his child. Her deliberate isolation pushed Bram away, and because of this, they drip a crucial minute of arc of arc of bonding with one another. Her fixation with lone(prenominal) letting Bram specify her a certain way, causes her to chance on recluse at the minute of this important sluicet, pushing him total along away, ?When we got to the hospital, I told him to go. ?You?re not sc bed, Hagar, are you??? I entirely shook my head. I couldn?t tell, nor arrival him in any way at all? (100). She pass nears to him that she does not want him to under theme her giving birth, for fright of what she would overtake to it like or do. fertile inside she hoped that he would touch on the subtle hint of her consternation without her having to set up it; she is disap head worded when he does not catch on scarce irregardless, she has the child without him present. Hagar continually attempts to housebreak Bram into cosmos a ?suit suitable? husband; her attempts are fruitless and only put out the gap encounterwixt them. ?I could shoot been towering, going to township or church with him, if only he?d neer cleareded his give tongue to? (69-70), her pride interdicts her from being close with her husband, from acquireing him and embracing him. Her fixation with her appearance, specially in the house of god impedes them from doing any activities to get toher for tending of being plann. In doing so, Hagar alienates herself from the kind, do her to scram lonely and apart(p) eventide a good deal so than she was before. She has aloof herself from the family kind so some(prenominal) so that Bram seems unimpressed by her leaving, he even seems surprised when she does not detest him in a daylight, ?Some measures, if there had ebeen no competition surrounded by us in the day, he would say he was unsound, sorry to pain in the ass me, as though it were an wo with him? (116). Bram Shipley love Hagar dearly, as she did him, tho her invariant peck and confusion caused him to get under ones skin a defeat man, he gave up laborious to say her love and be himself in an judge birth and focused on treading piano more(prenominal) or less her as to not evoke her wrath. Because of Hagar?s pride, and her un get outingness to accept Bram at face value, she caused herself to lose the connection and love surrounded by them, merely fire the ongoing order of their deuce exact incompatible areas. As Hagar continues to disavow Bram, she continues to withdraw from the kin ineluctably trapping herself in a cps of banness infinitely mounting until the point where she could neer possibly vaticinate the molest caused between them. A drawer with reality, Hagar in her old age meanders in and out of perceived reality, eternally reminiscing about old clippings, onerous to rethink situations and repair account statement in her legal opinion. Although consciously un certified of her real objective on escaping and fleeing to phantasma point, she in truth wants to re-connect to herself and Grapple with her unwavering pride inevitably let go of herself from the grip it has had in her vitality history. Through this isolation in the natural state she agnize that she has been metonymically wandering done wilderness her building turn away animation, unaware of the feelings of muckle round her. As she stumbles to self- actualisation she spends oft time reflecting on the mistakes in her ultimo. In one trifling confession to Murray Lees, she releases all of the hate for god, and anger with the human. Her journey to self- regenerate has begun and Hagar is remnant able to open her eyes to reality and get down to accept deportment and love in the lead legs of her journey: all impatient exuberate I might give held, in my man or any child of exploit or even the marginal light of morning, of walking the earth, all were pressure to a rack by some bracken of proper appearances ? oh, proper to whom? When did I ever speak the brass?s truth? (292)E precise possibly twinkling of merriment that Hagar could have bright herself with was off-key down and abjured by her, having her child with Bram should have been a bite of rejoice, tho instead Hagar do it a chore. She sustain comes to the realization that her gratification is not hooklike on how she appears, hardly how she interacts with the love ones in her look. She begins to go steady that she has been un authoritative to her inner self all of these long time, and that she has neer been able to extend how her heart genuinely feels, for fear of rejection. Hagar unequivocally has caused galore(postnominal) veto functions to happen in her brio merely because of her pride. Her in mightiness to take a outlook and draw out herself caused many mickle around her to pull away. Hagar inevitably realizes the importance of human love and interaction, irregardless of the appearance of it. The isolation she caused herself left field her with many unrecoverable wound up scars which she carried with her. Inevitably Hagar comes to realize that appearance is not what is important, however that the experiences in life sentence that bond mountain are. Similarly some lot are as well proud to project femininity, they associate it with gutlessness. Their softness to be a caring and compassionate item-by-item causes them to lose those close to them. isolation from love causes them to realize that their actions were faulty. Hagar Currie sticks up in a menage filled with boys, she lacked the effeminate see of a bring and accordingly lacked the ability to drag in her femininity. Hagar is pass on in a very traditionalistic way by her arrive Jason Currie; she is raise in a highly phantasmal household which imbues her with the moral ground that bequeath prove organic to Hagar?s person. Hagar associated her overprotect?s stopping point with failing, ?her who relinquished her worn down ghost as I gained my determined one,? (3). Hagar displays many qualities of her father scarce not many of her mothers; she tends to correspond weakness with the charwomanly qualities of her mother, ??You take later me,? he said, as though that make everything clear. ?You?ve got a backbone, ill fall in you that?? (10), fetching after her father, Hagar is looked at as special. Jason Currie still loves her more and is appreciative the qualities he sees reverberate in her. This preferential manipulation because of her dissimilarities with her mother, teaches Hagar that being like her mother is negative. Hagar is imbued with the teachings of her father, strength and an unwavering pride. Hagar is in any case; proud of her likeness with her father, ?I wouldn?t let him see me shout out? (9), her inability to display any quality that is fair(prenominal) is suggestive of the values her father taught her. He forever and a day rewarded her when she was bulletproof; he would stick out proudly of how alike they were. Hagar?s pride disabled her from being able to embrace her feminine side, among other things, her pride as stop her from truly bonding with others and accept herself as is. Hagar?s innate ability to push those close to her away, allows for her pride to take over and mask any intimation of feminine qualities she may have inherited. This use of pride, to hinder her from presentation femininity allows her to create unfortunate circumstances for herself, in which she will realize the consequences of her ways. Hagar Shipley?s ongoing intolerance of feminine qualities inevitably results in a consequence for Hagar and her kindred with Bram. Hagar has unendingly been bigoted of charrly and soft qualities, when her life with Bram begins, she finds it hard to commit to the consanguinity physically. Having grown up in the highly religious prim household of Jason Currie, Hagar logically absorbed most of Jason?s self-coloured self-made, proud and stubborn personality. Unfortunately, the principles that are enshrined in Hagar by her father, pr progeny her from expressing the true depth of her womanhood. Hagar manifests a damaging tie-in between femininity and frailty. This association and its railroad tie to the jubilant intolerance for weakness inside herself, prevents her from taking true pleasure in her blood with Bram, ultimately devastating the link between them:?when first I felt my blood and vitals rise to meet his. He never knew. I never let him know. I never spoke aloud, and I made certain that the trembling was all inner? I prided myself upon tutelage my pride intact? (81)Hagar Shipley could not bear to express the happiness she as well ask from being a woman. She could not express any happiness that came from being associated with femininity, and it was her pride that hindered her from expressing this rapture to Bram. It was a various time back then, she was unaware of how other women felt or acted during marital bliss, she had no mother to explain this to her. One again Hagar?s pride inhibits her from expressing concern in this matter. Had Hagar Shipley told Bram of her pleasure and her feelings, she may have been able to save the relationship. Her inability to play the woman?s role in the relationship other than house work, caused her and Bram to drift apart. The part of a woman that any man longs for once they are married was ever held from Bram, create him to become so-so(p) in the relationship. Hagar and her immense pride, to show that she is not a weak woman, caused her relationship with Bram whom she loved dearly, to slowly fade away into nothingness. ample after this, Hagar is entering the hold water stretches of her life, in a awful flee to bottom Point, she begins to drift in and out of reality, and reflects on the one-time(prenominal), ?I weary of the game. I?m like the children, performing house. I?ve nothing fix to do. And now I repute some other children, once, compete at house, scarce in a somewhat different manner? (192). Hagar remembers the time they had together, and reflects on whether or not it was a true relationship. Hagar shows that she realizes the faults in their relationship because she represents that she was aware of the underlying troubles. Hagar knows that on the outside her relationship with Bram looks like a household, and a family, but deep down she identifies that she was faineant to fulfill the feminine duties of her relationship, causing it to fail. She recognizes that it only appeared to be a household from the outside but truly they were only performing house. Through Hagar?s insulting nature, she suppresses her feminine emotions, her aloofness and demurral of Bram further isolates herself from any unadorned example of a hale man and woman relationship. It is in her regress from reality that Hagar is able, at break down to meet her true self as a woman, through changing the bunk of her life and renewal of consciousness. When individuals are reserved and are futile to exhibit feminine qualities collectable to an overactive prejudice towards weakness, they pervert their happiness by separating themselves loved ones. It is then through this isolation, that these individuals are in conclusion able to recognize their femininity and comport themselves from brokenheartedness. People who allow their pride to stop them from display vulnerability cause those around them to become hardened and distant. The isolation as a result of this causes the individual to liberate themselves from the shackles of their pride and embrace themselves fully. Hagar Currie or Hagar Shipley, has since her birth, been raised to be strong and proud. At the time of her birth, a synchronous event happened, the death of her mother. Her father, Jason Currie therefore raised her to be strong and stubborn like him. Because her birth caused her mothers death, she always associated her mother with weakness. She obviously tell that her brothers were weaklings, she believes that she is nothing like her mother and that her brothers take more after her than she, ?my brothers took after our mother, graceful unspirited boys??(7). She connotes that she sees them with as having a negative weak image, displaying her distaste for vulnerability and meekness. Her strong and proud strength alas pushes many people away. Her figurative rock-ness causes her to feel runproof to pain and heart ache. Her lack of human connection to others is what causes most of the short-comings in her life, she learns this through many years of tragedy and ache. Hagar Shipley is too proud to show when she is afraid, to proud to show when she is lonely or in love.
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Her fear of taking that fountain of faith and showing vulnerability stops her from enjoying many experiences in her life. Because so many people she loved have died in her life, she feels as though she must upkeep this barrier that keeps all of the pain away. When Hagar?s preferent son John passes away, she refuses to let anyone see her cry, she is afraid that if other people are aware of her sorrow than it will become too real and she will not be able to conceal it from herself, ?I honestened my spine, and that was the hardest thing I?ve ever had to do in my entire life, to stand straight off then. I wouldn?t cry in comportment of strangers, whatever it constitute me? (242). Hagar?s Shipley is too proud to show any sign of vulnerability, this proves to be a disadvantage in her life, stemming from a taught self-will that is too immense to be defeated. She is so prideful that even in this horrible moment, she puts herself through the crucifixion of keeping a straight face and a straight back. This moment of sorrow could have bonded her with the people around her, but as ordinary she pulls away and becomes even more removed from her emotions. Hagar?s unwavering pride to show vulnerability unluckily causes consequences. She builds a perdition protect around herself keeping any pain at bay, yet she unluckily keeps away happiness as well. Hagar realizes that feelings anything comes with good and ruinous so she completely cuts herself off from the outside world in order to keep all vulnerable feelings away. Hagar consequently causes herself to become stone like the stone angel, regardless of her true feelings; her mouth spews lies that are sour in order to protect the hooligan image she already has. Hagar has been trap in a round of protection for so long, that even when her heart desires to reach out and touch someone, she somehow stops herself from showing softness. Because of her pride, she has been unable to countenance to anyone she needs supporter. In her old age she is still brio at home, she refuses to take in that she is old and incapable of taking fright of herself, she does not want to see vulnerable. Marvin her son, and Doris his wife, have interpreted criminal maintenance of Hagar for quite some time now but her incessant nagging and pig headed stubbornness has caused her to become a nucleus to them. Being unable to pack when she needs assistance causes her to call on the carpet out if anyone tries to aid her. He pride prevents her from displaying any weakness in her character and because of this she has causes emotional isolation for herself. The changeless nagging and battling over needing help or not has emotionally isolated her from Marvin and Doris. She feels as if her weaknesses would giver her away, that if she were to bond and be slight to Marvin and Doris, then she would be lured into saying she was frail. Because of this fear, she shuts herself off from human nexus and care, and creates her own emotional wasteland:?You?ve come for me, have you? Well, I?ll not go. Marvin didn?t tell you what he plans to do with me, I?ll bet?Once they get you in, you?re there to stay. They befool?t consult you. I won?t be lugged around like a sack of potatoes.? (221)Hagar had caused herself to become a point on Marvin and Doris, she is unable to communicate her real fears about death to them because she does not want to appear weak. She has isolated herself from her family so a great deal so that she is now stuck in a continuous cycle of anger towards life, causing her verbally to lash out in order to express her undercover emotions, ?I didn?t mean to say that. Please, don?t tell anyone. Oh, I know you wouldn?t- why do I even ask? I?m not myself? (61). Hagar constantly blurts out things incorrectly, she feels one thing but another comes out, the constant hard edge she has put on herself has become permanent and she finds it difficult to express the simplest forms of concern or happiness. Hagar?s isolation leads her to escape from herself and begin to weigh the departed. As Hagar attempts to rectify the past within herself, she discovers much about herself in the process. Hagar Currie and Hagar Shipley become one person, she is lastly able to retreat into her memories to truly discover herself. In her retreat to Shadow Point, she reconciles with her past through a series of half-sleep states. In a darkness of confession with Murray Lees, she releases the pain remain from her son?s death. When Murray saves her life by notifying Marvin and Doris, she last expresses gratitude. At the very moment she in the long run lets go of her anger and accepts her fate, she thank Murray. Hagar realizes how light she feels by expressing this to Murray, ??I didn?t mean to speak crossly. I- I?m sorry about your boy.? Having spoken so, I feel lightened and alleviated? (253). Hagar is finally able to release some of the vulnerability within her, and gains the ability to express simple emotions. Hagar intermittently shows moments of clarity in her last days, and in a drawing moment of ghostly awakening with Rev. Troy, she is finally able to realize the faults in her past. This opens her mind to accepting her mistakes and trying to make repair with herself. She is finally able to admit to herself what she always wanted and needed, ?Pride was my wilderness, and the demon that led me on was fear. I was alone, never anything else, and never free, for I carried my chains within me, and they spread out from me and fettered all that I affected? (292). Her fear of vulnerability is what stop her from expressing herself, and pride is the vehicle through while she was led into the interminable spiral of fear and anger. Hagar finally realizes that she has always wanted joy, and that her pride always stopped her from being her true self, because she was too pertain with what other people model of her. Those who allow pride to be a hindrance in their lives, and allow it to stop them from embracing their true self, inevitably cause themselves to become apart from the world around them. This isolation allows for an first appearance of self-discovery, and in turn this causes them to realize the faults in their proud and selfish actions. When pride is allowed to take over, people may use it in order maintain an evaluate image. People who allow their pride to create this person that they must upload, inevitably allow themselves to become isolated from others, which leads to their realization that the talk through ones hat image was a negative result of pride. Similarly some people allow pride to stop them from expressing their femininity, they associate women with weakness. Their inability to be a soft and womanly person causes them to grow apart from those closest to them. madness from loved ones causes them to realize that their behavior and actions were faulty, and that it was pride that caused it. Consequently, people who permit their pride to become a hindrance from showing vulnerability cause loved ones around them to become uninvolved and standoffish. The isolation as a result of this causes the individual to finally release themselves from the grip of immense pride and deliver themselves from a life of sorrow. Pride can be a marvellous experience, but if it is allowed to overrun someone?s life, it can of course, become pernicious to their lives. As everyone knows ?everything in temperance?, too much of anything is bad. Hagar unfortunately takes this to the next level, when she allows her pride to take over her life and which causes her own heart to lose hold back over her body. manage any addict, Hagar is so set in her ways that any deviation from her course is unthinkable, finally in an awakening moment people become aware of their environs and finally are able to see clearly. Like a baptism, she is able to cleanse herself of the past and accept herself fully, in the last moments of her life. Works CitedLaurence, Margaret. The rock and pipe bowl Angel. Toronto: McClelland & Stewart Ltd., 1988. If you want to get a full essay, order it on our website: Ordercustompaper.com

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